Resident Evil: Extinction

Originally posted at Youthpad.

Resident Evil 3 Extinction movie posterMy rating of Resident Evil: Extinction: C- (Disappointing)
Cast: Milla Jovovich, Oded Fehr, Mike Epps, Iain Glen, Ali Larter, Ashanti
Directed by: Russell Mulcahy
Studio: Screen Gems, Sony Pictures

Resident Evil: Extinction isn’t worth the kilobytes that I’m using in my blog’s database for its review. I’ll still go ahead as this movie was a box office blockbuster. What exactly audiences saw in this is beyond my comprehension. A good example of why you shouldn’t believe Hollywood behind-the-scenes special shows. One thing that I’ve noticed is that when a movie is spectacularly bad, what studios tend to do is divert all those dollars to the behind-the-scenes department to jazz it up. Bad movies have actors babbling on and on on how fun the set was, how ‘visionary’ the director was, “Oh wowz thiz iz totully ossumz!” Ashanti bitches (while smiling of course) that she had to spend “so much time in the hot hot sun”; turns out her role was about 10 minutes long on-screen.

The first Resident Evil [my rating – A- (almost perfect)] still had something of a story to go on, but Resident Evil 3 doesn’t bother much with that. A simple 10-second long time-lapse sequence has the whole the Earth turned into a desert. Apparently Mr President, Department of Defense, Pentagon Cronies & Co haven’t survived the apocalypse. Everything is sorta ruled over by Umbrella Corp now. In an isolated Hive-like facility boffins are working on a cure for the T-virus from Alice (Milla Jovovich) clones. Elsewhere survivors are on the run from the undead. Rest everything is hack n’ slash with a dash of Alice’s new power of roasting crows, sending shockwaves in melee combat, playing with khukris, and levitating motorcycles. Who exactly do you think you’re kidding when at least three members of the crew are credited as ‘crow trainers’?

Of course you don’t expect anything deep and philosophical from a zombie movie. RE3 disappoints even in action and visuals. The only visual even remotely worth watching is a scene of post-apocalyptic Las Vegas simply because it’s so unique. Every other frikkin’ movie which has ever had to show always has that standard silly montage of one casino sign after another, a few advert billboards, then a shot of a few theatres; at some point one of the protagonists will lean out of the car / vehicle s/he is travelling in to ‘marvel the sights’. (Heck, even Bolt has critters standing outside the Bellagio admiring its fountain.) The so-called ‘Super Undead’ Umbrella Corp’s research scientist unleashes on the survivors (whom Alice has joined by now) to kill them off in Las Vegas turn out to be pretty lame actually. Not because they’re not badass, but the way these supposedly ‘super-fast’ and ‘intelligent’ zombies get killed within 15 minutes makes you wonder whether they would have survived an assault even from Ewoks.

Special effects are terrible. Explosions look so terribly fake – something you don’t expect from a blockbuster movie in this era. Seen the kind of explosions South Park uses? RE3 has explosions similar to that. The much-touted crow attack scene – compared to Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds (which itself is quite a lame movie; my rating for that would be C-) in behind-the-scenes – wasn’t anything very spectacular. The mutated Tyrant towards the end is done well though.

Sony Pictures always acts like a dick with any movie they associate themselves with. Once again, we are ‘regaled’ with endless shots of Sony products. Who cares if nobody else survived the apocalypse? Umbrella Corp must have its share of Sony Vaio laptops and Milla Jovovich must use a Sony short wave radio. Damned nonfunctional cellphone towers. They couldn’t sneak zombies checking text messages on Sony Ericsson phones in.

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Watch the theatrical trailer for Resident Evil: Extinction

Resident Evil 3 is a movie which feels made up entirely of poorly done video game cut-scenes. Nothing other than an avenue for Milla Jovovich to make money. She has worked herself into a corner where she can’t shake off this Resident Evil type role.

3 replies on “Resident Evil: Extinction”

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