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Personal Reflections

Be alarmed. Be very very alarmed.

A publicity poster from the Guildford Burough Council
A publicity poster from the Guildford Borough Council

I was about a write a blog post detailing happenings over the past few days, but I have quite a few pictures to share too. Along with the post text it would have made for one long post. So what I decided to do is a post the pictures in this post, and then mention the other stuff in a separate post. Oh, and the image above is to assure you that my cock is, indeed, huge.

"Would you like some syphillis with your Earl Grey, sir?"
"Would you like some syphilis with your Earl Grey, sir?"

I took this photo at a cafe near the town’s main bus centre. Which reminds me that I’m officially a resident of Guildford, now that I have seen the Bearded Lady of Guildford at the bus station. I came to know who she is later; at first I thought I’d seen some cross-dressing man with a beard wearing hiking boots. Brrr.

Alarmed 1

Alarmed 3

Alarmed 2

There is some sort of national conspiracy afoot in UK to have all foreigners drop dead laughing. I can’t stop laughing whenever I come across these umpteen signs saying some inanimate object is ‘alarmed’. I mean, they can put across what they’re trying to some other way, can’t they?

"Dude, like, watch out for that giant fucking tomato while walking will you?"
"Dude, like, watch out for that giant fucking tomato while walking will you?"

Taken during a MAD TV shoot. More on MAD TV and that particular shoot in my next post! Mate of mine tells me that ‘plant’ means ‘machinery’ in this context; after all, we were shooting at the under-construction Surrey Sports Park. I assure folks back in India that I’m not in any immediate danger of being eaten by giant broccoli.

The Lord is never far from you, it seems.
The Lord is never far from you, it seems.

Saw this parked outside the library one day. If you ever stray away from The Path, the Lord is reachable from his 24/7 cabin, right next to Wates House – where you can drop by for a few pints after you’ve been absolved of all your sins. I also met some Mormons.

Henry the Vacuum Cleaner. My housemates tell me that he's good at blow-jobs.
Henry the Vacuum Cleaner. My housemates tell me that he's good at blow-jobs.

Each house in Stag Hill Court (that’s where I stay) gets a vacuum cleaner, in case the housemates want to clean up something if cleaners aren’t scheduled to visit soon. Our vacuum cleaner is named Henry. For some reason this reminds me of Postman Pat. I have no idea why.

Cardboard and paper only
Cardboard and paper only

Look, even out dustbins have names. This is Doris. She likes to be stuffed. You can find her clones all over campus.

Norton Space Shuttle - occupies a shit-load of memory and takes ages to launch
Norton Space Shuttle - occupies a shit-load of memory and takes ages to launch

I don’t know who this belongs to precisely, but it’s one of my housemates. Cuddly little toy. And my housemates are such nice people.

HP Listen2U 1

HP Listen2U 2

HP Listen2U 3

HP toured a select few universities in UK as a part of its Listen2U campaign, on the launch of its dv6 artist edition laptop. They parked this bus outside Chancellors where you could and try out their laptops, jam on Guitar Hero or play Call of Duty : Modern Warfare. Got free HP-branded flip-flops from there too! As a part of the tour, HP sponsored gigs at these universities; at Surrey we had Reverend and The Makers at our student union nightclub Rubix. Apparently they’re chaddi buddies of fellow Sheffield band the Arctic Monkeys and headline gigs of the latter. To be honest, the gig at Rubix was just so-so; quite okay for a free gig. I must say that I like this song called Open Your Window by them quite a lot.

More later!

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If the Ramayana were Facebook

Awesome blog post I came across, sent as an email forward to me (via @megzj). There’ve been a lot of spoofs lately on how the Twitter / Facebook profiles of famous personalities would like. Here’s one spoof of the Ramayana on Facebook. My favourite? “Sita took the IQ test – Her IQ is 45. Can you beat her score?”